Boba Fett - Legend or Loser?

Boba Fett

Boba Fett is 'renown' throughout the galaxy as a vicious and effective hunter, a relentless hound and merciless killer. He is feared from Coruscant to the Outer Rim Territories because of this reputation - a reputation that is completely and totally undeserved.

A simple review of the facts of his involvement with the hunt for the fugitive Rebels, Han Solo, Leia Organa and Luke Skywalker provides more than enough proof of this. Consider these facts:

  • The following definition is from LANGENSCHEIDTS German-English English-German DICTIONARY, published in 1970. "Fett" means...
    fett [fet] 1. adj. fat; fleshy; voice; oily; land, etc.: rich; 2. fat; grease; drunk typ. m bold type; fleck m grease-spot; ~ig adj. hair, skin, etc.: greasy, oily; fingers, etc.: greasy; substance: fatty
    So his name implies that he is a fat, oily, grease spot. Never has there been a more apt description. And what's worse, this definition is not disputed by Fett's supporters - indeed, this information was gleamed from one of the biggest Fett supporting websites! Even his own followers can't escape the facts...
  • Fett has been know to be unable to fulfil the terms of a bounty, as noted by Lord Vader's instructions to him on the bridge of the Super Star Destroyer Executor - "No disintergrations." It would seem that Fett has a hard time keeping people alive, or even keeping their bodies intact (which raises a further question - if he claims to have disintegrated the bodies, what proof is there that he ever actually killed or captured the person in question? With no body there is no proof, and the claim of 'disintegration' would be a very simple way of taking false credit - building both reputation and credit balances without actually having done anything).
  • Boba Fett was captured and defeated by Lando Calrissian. Lando! Ha!! (See 'The Hutt Gambit' by A.C. Crispin.)
  • When Solo's ship, the Millennium Falcon, was close to capture by Imperial forces following the Battle of Hoth, a minor sensor malfunction caused the Falcon to seemingly disappear from the screens of an Imperial-class Star Destroyer. Following this 'disappearance', under orders from Lord Vader, the fleet moved off, providing Solo a cover for his escape. It was merely by accident that Fett happened to spot the Falcon, as it seems that the Bounty Hunter had been hiding in garbage (a most suitable place for a Bounty Hunter) that had just been ejected by the departing Star Destroyers - obviously hanging around because he had no ideas of his own.
  • Solo and company were captured on Bespin - by Imperial troops. True, Fett was there, but he in no way did any of the actual work of detaining the Rebels - he just stood around looking scary.
  • Even Fett recognises that the Imperial forces just simply outclass him. As he was leaving Cloud City, he felt the need to disguise himself as a Imperial lieutenant. Even he can't deny the attraction of the uniform I suppose... (Actor Jeremy Bulloch, who played Boba Fett, filled in for another actor who was to be the lieutenant that escorts Leia to Vader's ship)
  • Boba Fett was given great praise for having captured Solo and delivering him to the crimelord, Jabba the Hutt. In fact, it was Lord Vader who encased Solo in carbonite - all Fett did was deliver him, a task even a messenger droid could accomplish.
  • Fett's ship, Slave I, can't even decide how it wants to operate - it flies 'standing up', and lands 'on it's back'. Even the pitifully outdated Rebel forces don't use such pointless and redundant features on their ships.
  • While Fett was on retainer at Jabba's palace as a general trouble-shooter and bodyguard, Jabba died - hardly an effective body guard.
  • Also while on retainer, it seems that Fett became in some way involved with a singer at Jabba's palace - very unlike the 'heartless, cold and clinical' reputation that he has been ascribed by popular myth - and an alien singer at that (and not even a nice-looking alien). He was even reported as having appeared in public with a female Rodian on his arm (the Star Wars Special Edition premiere) - a Rodian female. Obviously he can't get a human girl...
  • During his 'final' battle above the Pit of Carcoon, Boba Fett was unable to stop a Wookie and three humans - of which only one was armed (and with an archaic lightsaber at that), another was blind, and the third was dangling helpless over the side of a sand skiff. Truly, Fett is a fearsome fighter.
  • What sort of idiot leaves an activation switch carelessly exposed on the back of his jetpack anyway?
  • Amid all the hype, and all the good press he gets for being such a tough guy... and his reputation for "surviving" the Sarlacc; HE SCREAMED LIKE A LITTLE GIRL when he fell off that skiff!
  • Most pathetically, Boba Fett died falling into the Sarlacc, having had his rocket pack accidentally activated by a minor tap from the aforementioned blind human. The old proverb is obviously true - great men have great deaths. Fett didn't.
  • Fett is dead. Period. He did not 'survive' the Sarlacc pit, as has been reported by various sources - the obvious intention of the scenes in Return Of the Jedi was to kill off the character, and even the creator of the Star Wars Trilogy, George Lucas, says that Fett is dead. The word of George Lucas vastly outweighs that of the novelists and comic book writers - after all, there's nothing to stop all their supplementary Star Wars work being completely wiped from Star Wars canon - it has happened in the past with the old Marvel Star Wars comics (which, at the time, were canon, and now are not). The only true measure of authenticity is if it was shown in the films. Boba Fett's return was not, so therefore, he is dead. (Any other sightings are merely figments of your own imagination...)
  • Even if you don't accept the fact that Fett is dead, Fett's 'resurrection' was certainly less than dignified. The sarlacc rejected his carcass, and he was spit out of it. After that, he fell in yet AGAIN, and he had to be hauled away from the it by a lesser bounty hunter wearing bandages... (guess the Bounty Hunter costume budget was getting a bit low when Dengar was getting dressed)

It should be most obvious to any and all who review these facts that Fett's reputation is a Myth and nothing more. He does not deserve it, or the revere he is held in by many. To reiterate my most famous of quotes - "Bounty Hunters. We don't need that scum!".

Boba Fett in particular.

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