THE HAND OF PIETT
Written and submitted by David Douglas

An investigation by several members of the Cult of Piett has revealed Admiral Piett's secret headquarters, and allow a brief look into the mind of one of the Empire's greatest officers.

One Cult member, stationed aboard the Imperial Star Destroyer Colossus, noted a strange geographical formation on the planet Colley, deep within the Unknown Regions. He immediately informed his superiors within the Cult and soon a team of crack members of the Cult were landing near the geographical formation which had a surprising similarity to the face of Admiral Piett.

An elevator was soon discovered in what appeared to be the hat of Admiral Piett. The elevator, the investigators determined, went almost half a mile below the surface. When the elevator stopped and the door opened, the team was met by a number of Imperial officers, all wearing a distinctive armband. These officers were hostile until the team revealed their identities as members of the Cult of Piett.

As it turned out, these officers were all members of the original Cult of Piett, the secretive Followers of Piett. This organisation, formed only minutes after Piett's promotion to Admiral, was charged with guarding his life and work. Thus, all of their number were transferred to this secret facility on the planet Colley.

The Cult of Piett members were bursting with questions. Why weren't they guarding Piett on the Executor? Why were they still here? What was so special about Colley? Why was there a geographical formation that appeared similar to Admiral Piett on the surface? And where could they get those cool Followers of Piett armbands?

The Cult members were taken to meet the commander of the Followers. It was General Veers, unseen since the glorious Battle of Hoth. Piett, impressed by Veers's ability and victory on Hoth, had charged him with commanding this facility and awaiting the Admiral's return. Veers revealed this facility was called the Hand of Piett.

"But General," the senior of the Cult of Piett members asked, "Why are you sitting here? Piett supposedly died at Endor."

"Ah," Veers said, with a knowingly glint in his eye, "Piett told me that if he was reported dead, that we were to merely await his return three years later. Which should be anytime now, I suppose."

Could it be true? Could the Great One not be as dead as reports suggest? This piece of data was immediately sent to Cult Command on the Executor II.

Veers continued, "This facility was built to preserve Piett's most important possession. With this facility intact, Piett can finally rise to the height of his genius. Nothing can stop Piett and his devotees while the Hand of Piett is ours."

Klaxons suddenly sounded. A awe-inspired voice said over the intercom, "Admiral on the bridge!" The door opened, and there he was, Admrial Piett, looking just as he did on the bridge of the Executor. Everyone fell to their knees.

"Ah! Hello there," Piett yawned, "Sorry I was so long."

Veers was the first to find his voice, "Admiral, how did you survive?"

"Simple, Veers, simple." Piett said, "Remember that device I had the Followers install on the Executor's bridge?"

"Yes." Veers replied.

"Well, it was a hyperspace wormhole activator. Whenever I screamed "Aaaaaaaaarrrrggggh!" and were leaping into the control stations, I would be catapulted across the galaxy to my secret holiday home, safe and sound." Piett explained.

"Why were you away for three years, through?" One of the Cult members asked.

"I was recovering. It wasn't easy, kicking my addiction to coffee, but with enough decaf and lots of rest, I succeeded where so many other failed." Piett said, "Mind you, I've been dying for a cup of strong coffee for years. One of you couldn't possibly fetch us a cup, could you?"

Several Cult and Followers members rushed out to do the Admiral's bidding.

"So, what exactly is the Hand of Piett?" the remaining Cult member asked.

Veers switched on a holoscreen. And there, in 16.7 million colors, was the Admiral Piett Homepage.