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THE LIMERICK TALE OF PIETT
Written and submitted by ?

There once was a man named Piett.
He owned a Corellian Corvette
It got blown apart,
And that broke his heart.
He said, "This'll happen again I bet."

Piett from then on climbed the ranks
While his friend named Veers drove in tanks
They both grew quite good
As Imperials should
Until they killed a rebel named Hank.

Hank was trying to steal
An Imperial ship named StarWheel
The ship was brand new
Of this old Hank knew
And its power he'd make his foes feel.

But Hank had forgotten one thing
As out of the dock he did swing
This ship was the Imps
And they ain't no gimps
And soon his sensors did ping.

Piett's Star Destroyer shot first
And of the two ships Hank's was worst
Its shields shut right down
Then Hank said with a frown
"At least the hull didn't burst."

Piett nodded over to Veers
And as though they'd rehearsed this for years
Veers sent out his troops
To capture that dupe
So they could put him in jail and in tears.

The shuttle it docked to Hanks ship
Hank knew it was the end of his trip.
He considered his blaster
But the troopers were faster
He was stunned and to the floor he slipped.

Piett had averted the crime
And it seems this was at a good time
For in system was Vader
And as we all know, later
Piett would serve HIM well in time.

Vader transferred Piett to his fleet
So Piett was quite quick on his feet
He did it quite well
And his chest did it swell
To know the Rebels were dead meat.

Well as time did pass Piett saw
In the Imperial system one flaw
That the morons up top
If they didn't keep shop
Vader would intro. their back to their jaw

This didn't seem good to Piett
And swore that he would never would let
His neck get choked
By the dude that was cloaked
Then him and Gen Veers made a bet

Whether the Imps lost or won
The two would nip death in the bun
For once in a raid
Veers found, ready made,
Two things that would let them have fun.

The things manufactured by Spaarti,
Whose discovery caused them to party,
Were two cloning pods,
To make copy bods,
So they both could survive the most Hardy.

Now we know that on Hoth Veers was killed
And near Endor Piett he was chilled
But out there somewhere
In the space without air
Fly two great men. Both strong willed

Now you Rebels out there heed my words
You are all just big Bantha turds
For judgment is swift
And his blade he does lift
To think you'll escape is absurd.

For Piett will shoot your ships down
And Veers on your bunkers will pound
Till the last one is dead
Not a tear will they shed
Though your relatives might wear a frown.

Piett and Veers live on still
Making Rebellious scum pay the bill
And somewhere in space
With a smiling face
They both know that they always will.

The end

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